Don’t worry!

This week has taught me a few things.  One, my baby girl can screech louder than I had previously thought.  Two, my self-scheduled child can change her schedule as she sees fit (I knew that, but this week it came to light very brightly!).  Three, I worry too much.  Four, I worry too much.

I had to repeat it.  I know that I can worry sometimes — OK, many times.  I also know that we’re not supposed to worry (Matthew 6:34).  I trust God to take care of my family and me.  But, I still worry.  This week I was worried about my crazy baby.  Lexiana is usually happy.  The beginning of this week, she was dramatically unhappy and not herself.  My Tuesday evening post was when I was at my worrying worse.  If Stacey today could go back and talk to Stacey on Tuesday, she’d have a few things to say.

I’d, of course, tell myself not to worry.  You see, by today my happy girl has returned.  She did not become autistic because she got the chicken pox vaccine.  She did not develop interstitial cystitis (the issue I deal with).  She did not have an adverse reaction to cow’s milk.  She was just plain fussy.  Based on how she’s drooling today, I’d daresay that a tooth is about to pop through somewhere in her mouth.

Today she is playing happily in the kitchen with her favorite Tupperware.

Today she sat in the backseat on the way to Target and happily chatted.  She looked at me as I put her in the shopping cart and laughed.  She waved to other people in the store and gave them her adorable smile.  Now she has gone from pulling out her favorite bowls in the kitchen to crawling under the table as I type this.  On Tuesday, I couldn’t have even left her alone to her own devices without a meltdown.  See, no need to have worried.

Perhaps one of these days I will learn to not worry.  I really do work on it.  I pray.  I try.  I give it to God.  Then, too many times, I pick it up and take it back with me.  Maybe next time she goes crazy — and I am sure there will be a next time since this wasn’t the first — I will remember this.  I will TRY to remember this.  I tried to remember the last times as well.  What I won’t do, though, is worry that I worry too much.  Well, maybe just a little…

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