A year makes a difference

I think I may have mentioned before that I’m not a huge fan of change.  And, yet, life changes.  Sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse.

I was hit by this realization yet again this afternoon. I was washing baby stuff and having a bit of a pity party.  My line of thinking quickly went down the path of the past.  I started thinking that last year I didn’t have to interrupt my lunch to move someone from her bouncy seat to the floor because she was bored.  I didn’t have to scramble and try to unload the dishwasher before someone started fussing in her jumperoo.  I didn’t have to try to organize bags of breast milk in the freezer in the house and the chest freezer in the garage.  I didn’t have to wash baby dishes while listening to someone fuss because she was tired in her jumperoo and ready for her afternoon nap.  I didn’t have to try and hasten to get my work done during said nap time.  Last year, my baby was easy to take care of.  I was just starting to feel her move around in my belly.  Last year, I could have spent the afternoon in my office working.  Or even schedule time for a nap if I wanted.  This year, I would consider giving my right arm for a nap.

Then I finished the dishes and took her out of the jumperoo.  We headed to her rocker where I held her for a few moments before putting her down for the nap.  Last year I didn’t have a baby girl in my arms.  Last year I didn’t have a sweetheart snuggling into my neck.  Last year I didn’t have little fingers playing with the collar of my shirt.

It hit me once again that last year may have been easier, but it was nowhere near as good.  Balancing work and a baby may be a struggle.  And I may fall short some days, but the pay off is beyond worth it.

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  1. Michelle wrote:

    I go through this same line of thinking all the time. It’s usually when the kids seem to get in the way of all the things that “I” want to do. Without fail God brings me back to the fact that it’s not about me and my life is so much better than it used to be!